Frankie on religion
TW: religion, homophobia.
NB: These are my experiences in white suburbia in very privileged (so-called) Australia, and these are my opinions only.
I was eleven when I first truly side-eyed religion. A simple experiment cemented my growing concerns about the reliability of this “god” I had been raised to believe in.
I was rehearsing for a church play in the main auditorium with my two adult co-stars when I decided to run a little test. It was a Saturday, and there was maintenance happening. We could hear my bio-dad in the ceiling above us, fixing something. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, “god is telling me that we need to move,” I whispered, my hand over my heart in a dramatic move most likely learned from my bio-mum. Without any hesitation, the two adults picked up their scripts and chairs and settled on the other side of the room in blind obedience. I knew in that instant, maybe not in tidy words but certainly in theme: ‘this is about control.’
I learned much later that Christianity was literally chosen out of a bunch of religions by Pope Constantine as the religion that would organise Ancient Rome. Opium for the masses.
Curiosity was annoying to the adults around me. Obey without questioning. Submit to the ‘will of god’ and don’t worry about your own agency. Don’t ask questions. Marry a man. Be a good wife. Have children with the man and bring them to church each Sunday. Everything was laid out. And we only ever hung out with other people who were ‘on the path’ too. We were in a weird little bubble with all the other families from church (I bet there was so much drama in that bubble).
I was taught that ‘the unsaved’ (non-pentacostal church of god christians) were morally defunct and in need of our help. I don’t think I met an openly gay person until my very late teens. I was told that gay people didn’t actually exist, that they were ‘confused and hungry for god’s love.’ Not a great thing to absorb as a ten year old girl who was already eyeing Felicity the church flutist, and daydreaming about running a hand through her beautiful curls. The internalised homophobia took a lot of unlearning.
I’ve come up against many other side effects from the religious beliefs enforced upon me as a child. At least some of the gullibility that caused me great harm must have been a hangover from being told that there was a man in the sky who knew my every thought, and indeed, how many hairs I had on my head! Oh my poor little autistic, literal, trusting brain.
Neuroscientist Abhijit Naskar said that “Indoctrination is not just demeaning to the human conscience; it is lethal for the flourishing psychology of the hungry, young mind.”
We’re already seeing generations who had internet access aging out of religion, just as we all age out of believing in father Christmas. Census data shows Australia’s drop in Christianity from 70.9% in 2001 to a humbling 43.9% in 2021 (put that in your ‘tithes and offerings’ bowl and smoke it!).
This drop doesn’t indicate a loss in morality. It’s a gain in critical thinking. If anything, we should give children a map instead of forcing them down a single narrow path. Kids could be educated about the many, many religions throughout human history, and then allowed to decide for themselves when they’re old enough.
I wasn’t given a choice; I was given a script. But I guess a faith that doesn’t survive a child's innocence was never really about choice anyway -it was only ever about the chairs being moved when told.
